When I Started Dieting
This is a two-part story with unexpected outcomes based on my own and several clients’ stories.
Part I
In my family, I was heavier than my siblings. Once I hit puberty, my parents encouraged me to eat less and exercise more. Initially, I lost weight and they were proud of me, but after awhile I gained it all back and felt terrible. I still feel ashamed about my body.
Take-Aways
Most parents think they’re doing what’s best for their children when they put them on diets because diet culture has taught us that thin = healthy.
If you were body-shamed and encouraged to restrict food as a child, try forgiving your parents for not knowing better. Even decades later, forgiveness is a powerful balm.
Diets don’t work. Even though food restriction may result in weight loss in the short term, long term studies of diets show that 95% of dieters regain all or more of the weight they lost within 2-5 years..
Part II
In my family, I was thinner than my siblings, but when I heard messages that they were too heavy, I started to restrict too since it seemed like the right thing to do. I started exercising alone in my room and weighing myself. People told me I looked good and that I ate “so healthy” which made it hard to stop.
Key Take-Aways
Making statements about dieting and shrinking our bodies impacts everyone who hears them, not just the person being addressed.
Complimenting people on having small bodies or on weight loss can cause harm. Instead, refrain from commenting on others’ bodies.
Disordered eating and over-exercising behaviors are often done in secret.
If you are concerned about yourself or a loved one engaging in disordered eating, learn more at the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA)* website.
*I do not work with clients who are diagnosed with clinical eating disorders (bulemia, anoriexia, etc.) or who believe they have one.
Dieting and diet culture wouldn’t make sense if we simply accepted that people come in all different sizes.
Virgie Tovar
